I have been suffering an existential crisis since I returned from Europe back in June.

Since then, I have been experiencing travel withdrawal in its severest form. I’ve made a million travel plans, and I’ve revised them. I’ve scoured the Internet for hours, wasting time, finding ways to travel. I’ve driven everybody absolutely freaking nuts. I find myself restless, depressive, and under-stimulated. I am uninspired, unmotivated. My hair is falling out. My FREAKING HAIR is falling out.

In Bosnia & Herzegovina, before my hair started falling out.The only benefit of staying still for so long is that I’ve been crazy active at the gym and I have buns of STEEL.

Life, my friends, has gotten boring. And with the winter months looming over me like a schoolmarm with a ruler in her hand, and as the days get a little colder, I’m finding it harder and harder to get out of bed in the mornings.

It’s not that I don’t love living in Newfoundland, or that I don’t enjoy my friends and family, or I don’t appreciate the fact I’m alive and healthy and self-employed. I will always be actively involved in the Newfoundland travel community. Always.

It’s just that if I don’t do it now, WHEN WILL I?

 

I’m fully aware that for the past decade or so I’ve stayed put mostly because I didn’t want to inconvenience anyone else. And I got settled. I got some cats and some furniture and I have a big badass wardrobe of nice new clothes and blingin’ neck adornments. And I love all these things. I like having a home, I truly, truly do.

Let’s not talk about how much I’m going to miss my smug Bella.But I’ve seen my roommates come and go like visitors. I’ve loved each and every single one of them with all my heart, but it just doesn’t make sense for me to have a house in St. John’s anymore. At least not right now.

So in spring of 2015, I’m packing up my belongings, sending Bella the cat home to live with my parents, and I’m moving to Berlin, Germany. I’ve been practicing my German. It’s really goddamned hard.

And then are the other things.

When I get stressed out, I like to colour. And drink beer. And yes, those are supposed to be flip-flops. Shut up.It took me a really long time to figure things out. First of all, I want to be everywhere, all at once. I want to live a million different lives. While figuring out volunteer opportunities in India I got sidetracked by Indonesia, and then I considered Australia because my time is ticking. (The youth mobility visa there is limited to Canadians under 31.)

But if I don’t make this move now, WHEN WILL I? I own nothing. I am single. I am 28 years old. I am Canadian, and as a Canadian I am fortunate to have SO MANY opportunities to work and travel abroad. I’ve been fascinated with Berlin for a very long time, and from there I’ll be poised to take on some exciting travel opportunities.

So, my tentative plans: Leave St. John’s in the spring, and participate in a volunteer archaeological dig of a Roman city in Menorca, Spain. The trip includes a jaunt over to Italy to explore Rome and Pompeii. It’s a whopping $3k expenditure, but this will help me to determine whether or not I want to pursue archaeology as a career. I am profoundly in love with the ancients.

From there: a vacation, perhaps for 20 days in India or Indonesia, or whatever opportunity arises. I am literally open to everything. ANYTHING. ALL THINGS.

And then: a move to Berlin, where I’ll be in central Europe and able to explore all the infinite travel possibilities open to me. I’ve been searching flights from Berlin to “everywhere” on Skyscanner, and it’s marvelous. Also: The Yacht Week in Greece. Who wants in?

I want my life back.Wherever I live in Berlin, wherever I am in the world, I will return to Newfoundland always. And likely frequently, because I’m pretty sure my parents aren’t going to set foot on an international flight.

And wherever I am in the world, I welcome all visitors. Since I’ve started casually talking about this move, I’ve had a dozen friends and bloggers say they’ll see me in Berlin. The world is small.

I hope you’ll follow me in this “arduous” process of moving to Germany. It’ll be a learning experience, and I would love for you to be there to witness my foibles and my ongoing baldness.

SETTING INTENTIONS. Sending happy vibes out into the universe. Lifting unnecessary burdens. FREEDOM.