The only thing that could drag me outside after a night of drinking with co-workers and other debauch activities involving nipple biting and kitchen dancing is nachos.

I like to think I’m a connoisseur of nachos. They’re the perfect food: greasy, delicious and they cover just about every food group. The ultimate hangover cure.

But so many restaurants just do it wrong. They fail to layer the toppings properly, so all the nachos at the bottom get ignored. There’s never enough cheese. The nachos are soggy. And won’t someone PLEASE think of the sauce?

I’ve tried them all, folks. But nothing rivals Mustang Sally’s Flaming Skillet nachos. And fortunately (unfortunate for my arse) they’re just a five minute walk away on George Street, the perfect location for post-clubbing drunkards.

Just look at them. I mean really look at them. They have pickles. And corn. And sometimes, when I’m feeling truly adventurous, I’ll add red cabbage. CABBAGE.

Their cheese to nacho ratio is outstanding, absolutely brilliant. In fact, sometimes there’s too much topping and not even nachos. I know, I’m speechless too.

The nachos are prepared and served up right in front of you, so you get to pick any topping you like. I do mean any topping, you can throw some beans on that shit if you’d like. Then you pick a sauce, the best one (in my opinion) being Sally’s Secret Sauce. I have no idea what’s in this mysterious sauce, but if I had to guess it’d be fairy dust and rainbow glitter.

Their key move is to put down a layer of nachos, toppings, and then more nachos and more toppings. Voila, the most colourful, perfectly distributed platter of nachos you will ever see in your life for just $14.

Where have you found excellent nachos?